"Do you ever worry that someone might mistake that for a couch?" The 15 dumbest upright bass comments

Barely scratching the surface, but here are some we doghouse aficionados all know and love, and perhaps a few newbies. I've undoubtably missed many, feel free to add - as if we need more. 

Wow, that's a big guitar you got there.

Don't you wish you played the flute?

Is that a cello?

My son plays the cello.

My son plays the violin.

Can you spin that around while you play?

Boom boom ba doom doom doom...

Whatcha got, a body in there?

Do you play the bass?

You have to play Linus and Lucy with the piano player!

What do you call that instrument?

What would happen if that fell down the stairs?

How do you fit that in your car?

Wow, that thing's bigger than you!